There's just so many weird side tangents and characters that are truly bizarre, like the detective's partner who is only given the below monologue before being killed off: Smith laughably takes on the John McClane role, playing the world's most talented helicopter pilot who unwittingly is hired to fly a group of terrorists around Los Angeles as they collect pieces of a MacGuffin device that can "shift the balance of power in the world. Most of the excitement in this movie comes from either obvious stunt people falling off of buildings or gunfights where the shooters are standing just feet away from each other but still continually miss. Shoot Jason an email or follow him on Twitter and give him an excuse to drink. That includes a very uncomfortable and completely unnecessary rape scene in the last act. One of the characters is female so she must be obsessed with having a baby. Anna Nicole Smith is already an absolutely dreadful actress, but the script still saddles her with complicated pilot lingo and lines like, "Well, excuse me for still believing in Sunday walks in the park, and little babies!
Truly an Awfully Good legend. You'll just have to watch both videos below to see for yourself. And you'd think that once she gets trapped inside the titular building and separated from her boyfriend, they wouldn't be able to fit in anymore gratuitous nakedness. He delivers every terrible line and Shakespeare quote with such zealous glee and overacts even the most simple action. There's really not much more to go on than that. There's a villain who speaks almost entirely in Shakespeare quotes. None of the aforementioned terrorists are competent fighters, nor do they look comfortable with any kind of weapon. In the middle of being chased by terrorists, Carrie has a random flashback to yet another prolonged sex scene, which for some reason takes place outside of a working farm. Don't ask me how a random busty helicopter pilot is an expert fighter and gunslinger who's able to fight highly trained terrorists, one of whom is British Special Forces. And the random hodgepodge of terrorist henchman feels like they were dreamed up by a middle schooler on Adderall. There's just so many weird side tangents and characters that are truly bizarre, like the detective's partner who is only given the below monologue before being killed off: And that's not to say that a more talented thespian could do a better job with this script. Just look at the DVD cover below, which includes "critic" quotes straight up bragging about the fact that its leading lady is naked in the movie. The janitor is black so obviously he's a Rastafarian. I was humping my goat. And one was a French guy with long white hair? Seen a movie that should be featured on this column? However, there is one clear VIP amongst this softcore mess. It may be a poor excuse for a movie, but it's also a great excuse to get drunk and have a good time. That's the first and last time someone said that sentence to Anna Nicole Smith during production. All before she has any real dialogue. Someone falls a long way Thanks to Franklin for suggesting this week's movie! Huber, who plays the head villain Fairfax, deserves a Lifetime Achievement Razzie for this role alone. Most of the excitement in this movie comes from either obvious stunt people falling off of buildings or gunfights where the shooters are standing just feet away from each other but still continually miss. Amazingly enough, this actor went on to be a politician and was elected to the German parliament in
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