I had several memorable callers. Just because a story is odd and mostly harmless doesn't mean it's not really, really human. I've got so many more, but that client story is my favorite! Sure enough, around 11pm she passed out on the couch and I saw my opportunity. It was intense and fun. I remember one dude came in and asked girls to let him rub their elbows. Advertising Asked whether he considered counterfeiting the money: Not quite sure what to do, he started to frantically Google our next move and I laid there, legs up over my ears as he hunted for god knows what in my treasure chest. Whenever I described something he liked, he'd say, "Oohhhhh, yerrr kinkyyyyyyy," in this weirdly creepy way.
He then proceeded to lick and kiss my right armpit and rub himself on my thigh. I really do love my wife. He was picky haha. The pleasure delay only made us more ravenous for each other. My ex thought he had made me cum HA , needless to say we were both confused for a good 10 minutes. Who wants some melons? We figured the best time to execute our secret mission was during the father-daughter dance, since all eyes would be focused on the bride. They were able to remove the sex toy, thank goodness, and as soon as we exited the hospital, we started cracking up. For her twenty-fifth birthday, I conspired with a few of our sorority sisters to throw her a party with a little special entertainment. This is equal parts fun and grossly informative. Now, there were some very strange requests, and we never judged a soul. Seriously, the more creative the fantasy, the more fun. Because somewhere in some club someone is stepping on a hamburger for him. My wife and I made a pact to have sex at every wedding we attend. Just whipped cream in a pie crust. Soon enough, though, a really hot girl sat down next to me and starting chatting me up about this and that. That's all he wanted for 20 minutes at a time. The driver definitely noticed. Recently had a different guy ask me to just fart, like continuously. We also did phone calls. This story comes not from a stripper but from the club DJ who heard it from the very upset women who had a very lucrative deal ruined by a dumb co-worker. By the time he finally finishes, I'm nearly hyperventilating, and was too lightheaded to take another call for an hour. Never did his penis come out of his pants. I'm pretty sure the service I worked for has long since shut down - I wonder if he graduated to actual hookers. While he was booking it, he asked if any of the girls needed to buy a car. As the pseudonym suggests, this dude was dull.
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